Last night my hubby and I were rudely awakened at 4 am. Our dogs started barking their heads off and from the urgency and insistency of their tone, I knew that it must be something big. I leaped out of bed, ran to the back door and flipped on the outside lights. Bear!!! I yelled, Bear!!! Bear!!! Bear! !!!! As if my husband needed to be told more than once. Right outside our back door was a big-ass black bear - at least 300 lbs or more. He looked around, confused by the sudden lights and noise, decided maybe it wasn't a good idea to stick around and reluctantly started up the hill away from the house. The dogs of course, continued their frantic antics - jumping, barking, whining, looking at us like "Why the hell don't you open the door?!!!"
"No way," I told them. "You are
not going outside so you can get into it with a bear!" The bear finally ambled off, his slow, halting gait suggesting that if things quieted down, he might come back. My husband went and watched through the bathroom window until the bear disappeared over the hill, then we climbed back into bed, determined to try and get a little more sleep from what was left of the night.
The dogs did finally settle down, but every once in awhile, I'd hear a low, rumbling growl, and an abrupt low woof! What that meant, I didn't know, but the bear must have decided to stay away for the time being , since there was no more excitement for the rest of the night.
The next morning, I sat at the dining room table, cup of coffee in hand, and stared out at the rainy, soggy deck and toward the forest beyond it. Wonder if that was the same bear as last fall? It had looked like it was about the same size as the one that had showed up a few times at our house the previous year. Hmmmm. Could it be?
I think it happened last October, but maybe it was September. I can't remember. Anyway, last fall, somewhere around 2:30 in the morning, we woke out of a dead sleep to loud banging noises. It sounded like an animal had somehow gotten into the garbage can. I turned to my hubby in the darkness. "Did you leave the garbage can outside the garage?"
"No."
"Did you remember to shut the garage door?"
"Yes."
Then why does it sound like a garbage can is being knocked around?"
"Don't know."
"Hmmm." Something seemed even odder than the banging sound. It sounded like a metal trash can was being knocked around, but our trash can was one of those big blue plastic ones that the city waste management trucks pick up with a large mechanical arm and dumps into the back of the garbage truck. So why did the noise have a metallic clang to it?
While I was trying to puzzle through this, the dogs went crazy - just like last night's episode, frantic antics again - ferocious barking, jumping up and down, running back and forth from door to door. Then I heard more noise. It seemed closer than the garage this time. What the ??? Finally, I got up, put my robe on and decided I'd go out onto our deck to try and look out into the yard. I'd be safe enough, since the deck was enclosed by a log railing and was 25 feet off the ground.
I flipped on the right side outdoor light and looked out. Nothing. I almost opened the door to walk out on the deck, but decided to walk over to the left outside light switch just to make sure. Imagine my surprise when I flipped the light switch, peered out onto the deck and saw a 300 lb bear less than a foot away. F*&/! F*&/! F*&/! F*&/! It's a
F@#%! Bear! (My hubby said later that I repeated this several times and at the top of my lungs.) He ran into the living room and all four of us (Jake and Kenzie, too) were face to face with a very large black bear. (Well, it was on the other side of a glass door, but that was little comfort.) It had climbed the huge fir tree next to the deck and then onto the deck itself. Having a keen nose and being very hungry, the bear had found the small metal trash can on the deck with the birdseed in it, pried it open and was helping himself to a late night snack.
The bear looked as surprised and as rattled as we were. With all the commotion and the blinding lights, he decided it wasn't worth the trouble after all, and proceeded to climb onto the log railing, balancing on it for quite awhile like some circus bear on a tight rope. Who knew bears were so agile??!! The bear climbed over and down onto the far side of the railing, hanging there by his paws and staring at me. Then suddenly he disappeared and I heard a loud thump as he landed on the grass below. I guess he must have taken off, since the dogs calmed down shortly after. I wasn't
about to go out there and find out.
We went back to bed, settled in to try and get some more shut-eye, and just as we were drifting off, again, the dogs go crazy, barking and carrying on.
S#@%! We jumped out of bed, ran into the living room, flipped the deck lights on, and yup, there was that bear again, this time, on the right side of the deck, balancing on the
other railing. He stood there, poised on the 3 inch log railing, trying to decide if it was really worth all the aggravation to go back and see if he'd left any birdseed behind in his first late night snack run.
He must have thought better of it, because he turned nimbly on the railing, reached over to the fir tree and sunk his claws in for a better grip, then eased over gently until he was securely attached by all four paws to the 400 year-old tree, and slowly backed down the tree until he was out of sight.
So now we've had 3 separate visits by a big black bear. I think we've finally gotten the message. We're going to quit feeding the birds till winter time, and rummage through our camping and fishing gear to find the bear spray. It is common knowledge in this area that when the bears are out, you really shouldn't go for a hike without it, and even
with bear spray, you should make alot of noise as you walk. The last thing you want to do is surprise a bear. Especially one with cubs. And especially if you have dogs with you. They'll run up and charge the bear, then turn around and run back to you, bringing the angry bear with them. Then everyone's day gets ruined.
So while I was still working on that cup of coffee this morning, I decided to get some expert advice about how to handle our visitor. I dialed the number for the local Montana Fish and Wildlife office and was transferred to their resident bear expert, Joe. I told him where I lived and about the bear visits last fall and last night. He told me that I should be very careful, carry bear spray, and when cooking dinner, not to leave the doors or windows open. Apparently, in Big Sky, just about 35 minutes south of here, there have been numerous reports of bears breaking into homes through partially open windows to get to the food - sometimes when the owners were home!
Good God, Almighty! I had no idea! Joe also told me that where we live, we could just as easily have a grizzly at our back door, or even wolves. "They are in your neighborhood, he warned. It's a (brave) new world out there - used to be, the wolves and grizzlies stayed in the high country, but with the enormous snow pack still up on the peaks even now, the bears and wolves are coming down lower in search of food and to establish territories. "
Crap! Was he
trying to scare the living daylights out of me? If so, he did a pretty good job. There will be no more hikes in the neighborhood until I can find that bear spray - and if it has expired, I'll have to wait even longer till I can go get a new can. Not something you want to find out the hard way, let me tell you!
Da bears are back again. And I thought after leaving behind the gators, the cottonmouths, the mosquitoes, and the hurricanes in Louisiana, I'd be safe. Guess not.
Last night, as I was trying to relax and fall back asleep, I fell the bed vibrate a little. S@#*! Did I mention we have earthquakes here, too?
